Store Policies:

Deadpan Exotics, llc

Last updated: September 18, 2025

By placing an order with Deadpan Exotics (“we,” “us”), you agree to the policies below. Our first priority is animal safety and a smooth customer experience.

At-a-Glance (Quick Facts)

  • We ship Overnight only; Mon–Wed scheduling, weather and animal readiness permitting. Hub pickup is strongly recommended.

  • Guarantees: Reptiles = live arrival + short health window; Amphibians & most inverts = live-arrival only (see details).

  • Claim windows: Inverts often have strict 1–2 hour DOA windows; pick up by noon when held at hub.

  • Weather rules: We follow industry temperature standards for heat/cold packs and when to hold.

  • Ship-to-Hub: Use a staffed FedEx Ship Center (not FedEx Office/retail partners).

  • 18+ only for live-animal purchases.

  • Law note: Example — Dubia roaches can’t be shipped to Florida (state restriction).

 

    • We sell non-venomous reptiles, amphibians, and invertebrates.

    • U.S. sales only. Some species have extra restrictions by state/city; example: Dubia roaches (Blaptica dubia) are prohibited in Florida.

    • You must be 18+ to purchase live animals.

  • You’re responsible for knowing and following your local, state, and federal laws before purchasing/keeping an animal. Orders in violation of law are void of guarantee and may be cancelled.

    • Payment is due in full before shipping. We accept major cards and standard site checkout methods.

    • We do not accept person-to-person apps (e.g., Venmo/Cash App/Zelle) for live animals.

    • Holds/Payment plans (optional): Non-refundable 50% deposit; balance due by the agreed date. Animals ship only after paid in full.

    • Cancellations: Before shipping, deposits are non-refundable. After shipping, orders cannot be cancelled.

    • Overnight only. We typically ship Mon–Wed to avoid weekend holds.

    • We may hold your order for animal safety or weather risk.

    • We encourage shipping to a staffed FedEx Ship Center for pickup — it’s safer and expands safe temperature ranges with many retailers. Pick up by noon on arrival day.

    • Note: FedEx Office/retail partner counters (e.g., drugstores) do not accept live-animal “hold for pickup.” Use a true FedEx Ship Center.

    • < ~38–40°F: Do not ship; wait.

    • ~38–60°F: Use a heat pack per guidelines.

    • ~60–80°F: No heat/cold pack.

    • ~80–92–95°F: Use a cold/phase-change pack and/or Hub pickup; otherwise hold.

    • > ~92–95–100°F: Do not ship; wait.

  • All Animals — Live Arrival
    Guaranteed when:

    • Overnight service is used, and

    • Someone is present for the first delivery attempt or the box is held at a FedEx Ship Center and picked up by noon.

    Reptiles

    • Live arrival plus 3 day health window. Contact us within 24 hours if anything looks off so we can help.

    Amphibians

    • Live arrival only. Report DOA within 1–2 hours of delivery or hub pickup Include required photos (see next section).

    Invertebrates (tarantulas, scorpions, etc.)

    • Live arrival only. Report DOA within 1–2 hours of delivery or hub pickup Include required photos (see next section).

  • To keep claims fast and fair, please send the items below. Keep all packing materials until we finish the review.

    Timing (strict):

    • Invertebrates (tarantulas, scorpions, etc.): Report DOA within 1–2 hours of delivery or hub pickup.

    • Reptiles/Amphibians: Report DOA as soon as you open the box. For health concerns, contact us within 24 hours of delivery/pickup.

    Email subject: Order #____ – DOA/Issue

    Attach these photos (clear, well-lit):

    1. Shipping label showing name, address, and tracking number.

    2. Outer box (full shot) and any visible damage (close-ups).

    3. Inside packing (insulation/foam and heat/cold pack orientation).

    4. Cup/bag: one photo before opening, one after opening.

    5. Animal: full-body photo(s) on a plain surface.

      • Invertebrates: include a photo next to a ruler (for scale).

      • Reptiles/Amphibians: include a clear full-body photo and any visible concern (mouth, vent, injury, etc.).

    Optional but strongly recommended (helps us approve faster):

    • A single, continuous unboxing video from opening the outer box to the animal being removed from its cup/bag. (A phone video is fine - no edits.)

    Important:

    • Pickups at FedEx Ship Center: Please pick up by noon on arrival day; we verify time via carrier scan.

    • Do not dispose, freeze, force-feed, medicate, or attempt at-home treatments before we respond - this can void coverage.

    • Keep all materials (box, insulation, cup/bag) until your claim is resolved.

    Resolution:

    • Approved claims are handled with a replacement, or store credit if a replacement isn’t available. (Shipping costs are not refundable.)

    • Email us immediately with your order # (and “DOA” in the subject if applicable).

    • Attach clear, timestamped photos of the animal and the shipping label; include the packing (insulation/cups/bags).

    • For inverts, include a photo of the specimen on a ruler.

    • Keep all packing until we finish the review.
      If approved, we’ll issue a replacement or store credit if a replacement isn’t available. (Shipping costs are not refundable.)

    • Unless stated, animals may be sold unsexed. Juvenile tarantulas under ~3″ are not sexed by us.

    • Photos are representative unless the listing states “exact animal” — in which case you receive that individual.

  • Live animals are not returnable. Approved claims are handled via replacement or store credit if a replacement isn’t available.

    • Expo pickup: We can bring prepaid animals to shows we’re attending. Bring a photo ID and your order email. Missed pickups without prior notice are treated as a cancellation (deposit forfeiture).

    • Local pickup: When offered, we’ll coordinate a time and location.

  • Please have correct habitat, temps, and supplies ready before arrival. Mishandling, leaving packages outside, or delayed pickup voids guarantees. When in doubt, contact us right away — we’re happy to help.

  • Questions before or after purchase? Email us — we respond quickly during business hours. If you need to file a claim, contact us immediately and within the stated window to keep coverage intact.

Contact us.

DeadpanExotics@yahoo.com
(701) 269-8225


Jamestown, ND 58401